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20 Nov

Any non-white person who has online dated will know that race always comes into it.

Even if you don’t explicitly mention it, your inbox will inevitably contain messages from people fetishising your colour.

A man messaged her, telling her how attractive he thought her “Latino tan” was.

When she pointed out that she was actually Indian, and naturally brown, he stopped replying immediately.

“I wanna join NASA,” he once told me while we jammed to music in his garage.

Like Bernard, the guys I've dated have all had wild aspirations. There was the music producer, the impassioned civil rights activist and so on and so forth.

I grew up in one of the seventeen cities in the United States named Rochester (Wikipedia, 2015).They would ask me about the “colored kids” at my job as a camp counselor and spoke the word “bi-racial” in hushed tones, as if it were something to be ashamed of.After deciding to enroll at Towson University, friends of mine joked about me going to “the hood” and the violence in the Baltimore area, but I was never worried.Christian Rudder, the site’s co-founder, says: “OKCupid users are certainly no more open-minded than they used to be.If anything, racial bias has intensified a bit.” A close friend, Sarah, is living proof of this.