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My suggestions will help you to be mindful, date with your eyes and ears open, to come from a place of personal security, and to be aware of what to look for when considering progressing from dating into a fully-fledged relationship. You will find that you have much better dating experiences when you like and love you. No matter how much your body and your imagination screams yes, leave sex out of the first few dates, longer if possible. It’s a getting to know you period where you can get a sense of how much you click as well as whether you have enough going on to forge a relationship.

If you have sex before you get to know someone or as a of getting to know someone, it will cloud your judgement and is likely to put you in The Justifying Zone, that special mental place that we go to when we sexually or emotionally invest too soon and look, or should I say, scratch around, for reasons to justify the initial investment because we don’t like to think that we’ve slept with someone who is not appropriate for us. This period is for you to learn about the other party even if what you learn spells the end of your involvement. Contrary to popular opinion, the key thing that you need to discover is whether you share common core values – this is what will take you from dating into a bona fide relationship. While I appreciate that you’ve got to get out there and meet people, it shouldn’t be done to the exclusion of having a life otherwise every date will carry more meaning and weight than is warranted. It may feel like the best thing to do is jump back into the saddle after a break up but if you haven’t given yourself time to get over it, you are likely to end up sabotaging your dates.